Sometimes I find myself asking that question over and over … ’cause I just can’t wrap my brain around the most obvious answer.
I’ve been following — or attempting to follow the Lord — for almost 45 years. (Man, do I feel old!) You would think that I would have some lessons learned — but, nope — some I just need to keep learning over and over.
This week I received some news that was a little disappointing. I told myself that I was leaving the decision in God’s Hands. I did what I felt was my part — yet, the final decision would, ultimately, be the Lord’s. I left it with Him … or so I thought. The next day, when I received notification that things weren’t going to go the way I had decided were the best for me — it wasn’t the answer I wanted … well, let’s just say that the first thing out of my mouth wasn’t “Praise God!”
It was more like — “This isn’t fair! God, how could you allow this to be the answer?? Don’t You care about what I’m dealing with?” And, for the next hour or so, God let me have my “pity party.”
Then, just like Elijah (1 Kings 19:12), God calmly and lovingly whispered to me my favorite Bible verse: “But my God shall supply all your needs according to His glorious riches in Christ Jesus.” (Phil. 4:19)
“Judith, I’m in control … I’m still on my throne. Even though you may not be able to see the next bend in the road, just trust Me – I’m right here with you. I know what lies before you. There’s a lesson you need to learn — it will be for your growth and good. Just remember to trust in Me. I love you so much … you are very precious to Me and ALWAYS in my heart and in my thoughts.”
Then … just to underscore that He is willing to “supply all my needs” … even my need for reassurance, just at that moment, He had a semi pass me. I glanced up at the back of the truck and what do you think I saw written it? … Isaiah 40:31: “…but those who hope in the Lord shall renew their strength. They will soar on wings like eagles; they will run and not grow weary, they will walk and not be faint.”
I was starting to get the message … but God wasn’t through proving His point. He reminded me of a couple of my favorite songs:
- “Praise You in the Storm” by Casting Crowns … http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=0i5MzJ9nLjo … “And I’ll praise you in this storm and I will lift my hands for You are who You are no matter where I am. And every tear I’ve cried, You hold in your hand. You never left my side and though my heart is torn, I will praise You in this storm.”
- “Blessed Be the Name” by Tree63 … http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=fkbzAWW8Wvg … “Blessed be Your name when the sun’s shining down on me; when the world’s ‘all as it should be’ … Blessed be Your name. Blessed be Your name on the road marked with suffering, though there’s pain in the offering … Blessed be Your name.”
I was watching a sermon this week by Pastor John Ortberg (one of my favorite authors). He was talking about how many people trust Jesus to get them into heaven when they die; but then he asked, “What if you don’t die tonight? …. Will you trust Jesus to help you live? … Will you trust Him with your life?”
Yes … it’s simply a matter of trust … Do I trust Jesus with every aspect of my life? Do I trust that He loves me and ALWAYS has my best interests in mind? Do I trust that He is still on His throne and in charge of this world … even the little piece in which I live?
Yes!!!
So why do I still have moments of doubt? How many times do I have to learn this lesson? Why hasn’t God just given up on me and say that I’m a lost cause?
And then I read the words of the Lord found in Hosea …
“How can I give you up, Ephraim? How can I hand you over, Israel? … My heart is changed within me; all my compassion is aroused.” (11:8)
“I will ransom them from the power of the grave; I will redeem them from death. Where, O death, are your plagues? Where, O grave, is your destruction?” (13:14)
“I will heal their waywardness and love them freely …” (14:4)
Why doesn’t God give up and wash His hands of me? … Because He loves me (and you, too) — and I’m so very thankful that He does.
May everything we say and do be pleasing and acceptable in His sight.
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